178 pounds 

Someone called me skinny today
And when I looked down
I thought they might be right,
But I still feel like I did
50 pounds ago.
I’ve been thinking a lot about these kind of things recently
And I’ve decided that I don’t want to die
With a cigarette in my mouth
But I don’t know how to live
Without the pain in my lungs
So I’m waiting to see which kills me first
The cancer
Or the pain of not knowing what comes after.

I find peace every morning
Knowing my time is short
And Im not dead yet.


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